A Spy For a Spy Read online

  Or maybe… What if he sent me out on a mission, and I purposely screwed it up badly enough that he’d have to demote me?

  The light changed, and I groaned as I drove through the intersection. Screwing up one of Stemp’s missions meant breaches of national security and innocent people dying. Not an option.

  What if I just refused to go?

  I parked the truck in the lot across from the Sirius Dynamics building and stared blindly through the windshield, my heart racing.

  Insubordination. What would Stemp do?

  My grip tightened on the steering wheel and I willed my fingers to slacken enough to ease the pain in my knuckles. I knew damn well what he’d do. My heart fluttered into my throat and lodged there, vibrating.

  Jail.

  Captivity.

  A deluge of adrenaline turned my breathing fast and shallow, and I fought down panic. Breathe. Just belly breathe. In. Out. Stay calm.

  Okay, so insubordination wasn’t an option.

  A figure loomed up in the half-light outside my window and I let out a strangled yelp, jerking around in my seat. For an instant I thought I was hallucinating out of sheer anxiety, but in the next moment I registered Stemp’s flesh-and-blood presence. I pried my fingers off the steering wheel and opened the door, hoping my trembling knees wouldn’t drop me in the grubby snow of the parking lot.

  “Kelly.” Stemp surveyed me with his usual lack of expression. “Is everything all right?”

  “Fine.” I slammed the truck door behind me and forced my legs into what I hoped was a confident stride. Stemp matched my pace as I headed for the building, and I halted abruptly, feigning sudden realization. “Oh, I forgot my gloves in the truck.”

  I turned back, sending out a psychic plea for him to just keep walking. “See you later,” I added, hoping he’d get the hint.

  “Sooner,” he corrected. “Sign in and report directly to my office in the secured area.”

  “Okay.” The word squeezed out of my suddenly constricted throat, and I trudged back to the truck, repressing the urge to get back in, drive away, and keep on driving forever.

  At the security wicket in the lobby, I dropped the pen twice before managing to scrawl a shaky version of my signature on the sign-in sheet. I held still for the retinal scan outside the heavy door to the secured area with roughly the same enthusiasm as if the small aperture contained a firing squad.

  When the door released, I sucked in a deep breath before stepping into the confines of the time delay chamber. Trying to ignore the muffled thud-click of the door behind me, I took two rapid steps forward to activate the next retinal scan.

  My breath hissed out between my teeth while I eyed the second hand on my old wristwatch, willing it to traverse the thirty-second arc faster. The low ceiling felt like a rock slab, poised to flatten me.

  Shit, stop it! Think about open spaces.

  I clamped down on the need to pant in the still air, forcing myself to take deep, slow breaths. When the click of the release sounded at last, I snatched the door open and stumbled down the cramped concrete stairwell as rapidly as I could on wobbly legs. At the bottom, I yanked the door open and lurched into the white corridor, propping myself against the wall beside the door and clamping my eyes shut.

  Cool air wafted against my face, and I concentrated on slowing my pounding heart. Not trapped. I could be out of here in thirty seconds. Only thirty seconds. Lots of nice, fresh air down here. Nothing to worry about.

  My adrenal glands remained unconvinced.

  “Are you all right?”

  Every muscle in my body convulsed and I crushed my scream into a squeak behind clenched teeth as my eyes flew open. The small man in front of me took a quick step away from my half-raised fists.

  “Are you all right? Do you need help?”

  His soothing tones heated my cheeks with a flush of embarrassment. Jesus, nothing like getting caught acting like a raving loony.

  I twisted my stiff lips into what I hoped resembled a smile. Judging by his uncertain expression, it might not have been as convincing as I’d hoped.

  “I’m fine.” I attempted a light laugh that came out sounding more like a bleat. “Sorry, you just startled me. I didn’t expect anybody else to be down here. I’m just a little claustrophobic, so it usually takes me a few minutes to adjust to being down here. I was just taking a few minutes…” I bit my tongue before I could babble any more and pulled myself together. “Thanks for asking. I’m fine.”

  I turned and strode down the hall, hoping he couldn’t see how much my legs were shaking.

  Steeling myself, I tapped on the door of Stemp’s office. At his ‘Come’, I swung the door open, and my heart sank at the sight of the stunning blonde woman seated in one of his guest chairs. Sure enough, she had her little briefcase with her.

  Oh, shit.

  I held my voice under tight control, but it came out shrill despite my best efforts. “Hi, Jack.”

  Her radiant smile warmed the room. “Hi, Aydan. How are you feeling?”

  I cleared my throat and tried again for a casual tone. “Fine. Still a little sore, but okay other than the bruises.”

  As I shuffled closer, she rose and squeezed my hand. “I’m so glad you’re all right. We came so close to losing you.” A faint crease formed between her flawless brows, her big blue eyes full of concern. “You still look as though you’re in pain. Are you sure you shouldn’t take it easy for a few days?”

  I summoned up a smile. “No, I’m fine. Thanks.”

  “I’m glad to hear it.” Stemp spoke for the first time, his reptilian gaze dissecting me. “Dr. Travers, please hook her up to the polygraph.”

  I sank into the chair he indicated, controlling my breathing and keeping my posture relaxed.

  Earlier, it had seemed like a good idea to convince him I’d been lying about being an agent. Now it occurred to me that he might just decide I couldn’t be trusted and kill me on the spot. Especially if his questions forced me to tell him the details I’d deliberately omitted from my last report…

  I resisted the urge to gulp.

  Jack laid her small case on his desk and extracted the familiar band of electrodes. She shot me a brief smile as she settled it around my forehead before turning back to twiddle some knobs in the case.

  “There.” She stepped back, giving Stemp a nod. “You may begin, Director.”

  “Thank you. You’re dismissed, Dr. Travers.” Stemp’s flat gaze flicked in her direction before returning to bore into me. “I’ll call you when we’re finished.”

  Jack stiffened. “Director… I… uh… you…” She straightened her spine, her usual crisp tone returning. “You do realize that this polygraph is experimental technology, do you not? Though all my current research indicates it’s accurate, I haven’t completed testing-”

  “Yes, of course.” Stemp waved a dismissive hand.

  She stood her ground a moment longer, her blue gaze raking his impassive face. “Don’t shoot her this time,” she snapped before turning on her heel to march out. The door closed behind her with unnecessary firmness.

  Stemp leaned back in his chair, steepling his hands and appraising me over top of them. “If you would be so kind as to place your weapon on my desk. Slowly.”

  I leaned painfully down to ease my gun out of my ankle holster. When I laid it on his desk, he fixed me with his snake-like eyes. “You will answer yes or no. Are you carrying any other weapons?”

  I sank back into my chair. “No.” Realization struck even as I spoke the word. “Uh… not really…”

  A flicker of movement made me jerk my gaze up to see his gun trained steadily on my chest. “Would you care to try that answer again?”

  My brain bobbed weightlessly in a sea of adrenaline while the damning red light pulsed in my peripheral vision, but apparently I had catapulted beyond fear. My voice came out sounding incongruously conversational.

  “I forgot about my knives. I don’t even think of them as weapons.”

/>   Stemp nodded almost imperceptibly toward his desk. “If you please. Slowly.”

  “Okay.” I carefully unzipped the front pocket of my waist pouch and extracted my sturdy lock-bladed knife and a smaller multi-tool jackknife. I slid them onto his desk before leaning back cautiously in my chair again.

  “Thank you. Are you carrying any other weapons?”

  “No…” The word came out suffused with guilt while I racked my brain for anything else I’d forgotten, but apparently the polygraph was satisfied this time. Its light glowed green.

  Stemp fixed me with an unblinking stare. “Do you have any other means of harming me?”

  What did he think I was going to do? Break out some secret ninja skills? Use the awesome power of my mind to melt the gun in his hand? The only weapon I could possibly use against him was his big secret, and we both knew I’d never blab that.

  “No.”

  The light shone blood-red again. My heart battered my chest while Stemp sat in silence, his gun and gaze trained on me with equal deadliness. A small, detached portion of my racing mind admired my composed tone.

  “Could you rephrase the question?”

  His voice was completely flat. “Why would I do that?”

  I couldn’t prevent myself from glancing around the room before I met his gaze and spoke softly. “Is this room secure? Could we be overheard?”

  “It’s secure. Stop stalling. Do you have any other means of harming me? Yes or no.”

  “Yes. I know about your wife and daughter in Bulgaria. That information could harm you if it reached the wrong ears.”

  His gaze faltered, his knuckles whitening on the gun, and for an instant I thought he’d pull the trigger. Instead, he matched my quiet tone. “True. Do you have any other means of harming me besides that?”

  “No.”

  I eased out a breath when the light glowed green.

  Stemp slowly laid his gun on his desk, his eyes never leaving me. “I can see this will be an interesting conversation.”

  Chapter 4

  Stemp regarded me in silence for a long moment before speaking. “Let’s begin at the beginning. Is your real name Aydan Kelly?”

  “Yes.”

  “Have you ever used another name?”

  “N…” I caught myself just in time. That would have been true a couple of weeks ago, but not anymore. “Yes.” The green light flashed reassurance.

  “Do you also use the names Arlene Widdenback and Arlene Cherry?”

  I tried to keep my expression neutral, but I was pretty sure some venom leaked through. Someday I’d make him regret assigning me that cover…

  “Yes.”

  “Have you ever used any other names besides those?”

  “No.”

  I knew better than to relax into the easy questions. Sure enough, the next one was a biggie.

  “Are you a secret agent?”

  “N… uh… yes…” Dammit, both ‘yes’ and ‘no’ were equal parts truth and lie. I wasn’t an agent, but he’d promoted me to agent status, so did that make me an agent or not?

  I shot an anxious glance at the case. Green light. What would it have done if I’d said ‘no’?

  Stemp’s next question pulled me back from my nervous speculations. “Does your direct command work within the Sirius Dynamics command structure?”

  At least that was an easy one. “Yes.”

  “Would your direct command do anything to compromise national security or our operations?”

  “I seriously doubt it.” Stemp might be a dickhead, but I was pretty sure he was loyal.

  He eyed me. “Yes or no, please.”

  “How the hell should I know? You tell me. Are you a traitor?”

  He raised an eyebrow. “So we’re talking about me, are we? Thank you for your vote of confidence. No, I’m not a traitor.” After a short silence, he spoke again. “Let’s talk about your other chain of command.”

  I swallowed my palpitating heart and held my voice steady. “I don’t have another chain of command.”

  He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his desk. “That is directly contrary to what you told me four days ago.”

  My shrug felt more like a nervous twitch. “Yes, but then I told you afterward that I didn’t have any other ops.”

  “Very well, Kelly. Let’s find out. Do you have any other ops? Yes or no.”

  “No.”

  Stemp sat back slowly in his chair, eyeing the green light.

  “Did you have another op four days ago?”

  My heart pistoned against my ribs, and I couldn’t prevent another involuntary swallow to moisten my dry throat. “Y-yes.” My voice was just above a whisper.

  Shit, shit, shit…

  “You told me four days ago that if anyone else found out about your other op, the consequences to you would be…” He hesitated, apparently searching for the correct word. “…disastrous. Does that still hold true?”

  “Yes,” I croaked.

  My mind scurried away in a desperate bid for freedom. Jack should put some more lights on that thing. A big honkin’ strobe for when somebody spoke a truth of the magnitude I’d just uttered. When Stemp found out I’d been lying, ‘disaster’ wouldn’t even begin to cover it…

  His voice jerked my attention back to the situation at hand. “Would your direct command for any of your other ops do anything to compromise national security or jeopardize our clandestine operations?”

  Another easy one, since I’d only had one so-called ‘op’ and my ‘direct command’ had been me, myself, and I.

  “No.”

  Stemp glanced at the green light before scrutinizing me for approximately a lifetime. My nerves twisted into knots, anticipating the killing blow.

  I managed not to betray myself with a start when he spoke again. “You seem very sure.”

  “Yes.”

  Another long pause. “You must have been working under that command for some time, then.”

  Yeah, for my entire life…

  “Yes.” I held myself under rigid control, stifling a hysterical giggle when the green light flashed again.

  “Have you ever conveyed sensitive information to anyone outside your command structure?”

  “No.”

  “Do you have reason to believe any of your other ops would ever compromise national security or our operations?”

  “No.”

  “Would you ever intentionally compromise national security or our operations?”

  “No.”

  Green light all the way.

  Stemp sat immobile, his monochrome colouring and expressionless eyes reminding me all over again of a rattlesnake. I held myself completely still while his gaze ripped my soul from its moorings and inspected it like a cheap T-shirt held up to the light.

  “Would it be in the best interests of our clandestine operations and our national security if I chose to trust you?”

  I looked him square in the eyes. “Yes.”

  “Would it be in my personal best interests to trust you?”

  “Yes.”

  The green light kept shining, bright and steady.

  He smiled. A real smile that erased ten years from his face and warmed his eyes to golden brown, crinkling them at the corners. “Thank you. I’m very glad to hear that.”

  Dumbfounded by the transformation, I closed my gaping mouth as he turned away to pick up the phone.

  “Dr. Travers, we’re finished with the polygraph.” I could still hear the smile in his voice. “I didn’t shoot her this time.”

  When Jack had packed her equipment and departed with a relieved smile, Stemp pushed my gun and knives toward me and sat back in his chair, his emotionless façade in place once more. As I finished stowing my gear, he spoke.

  “Your next meeting will be with a psychologist. We’ve developed a psych profile based on your behaviour and reactions over the past eight months, but this will serve to fill in the blanks. It will also help me determine how to best use your skills
.”

  I swallowed hard. “Uh, yeah, about that…” At his inquiring glance, I stumbled on. “Um… I… you, um, shouldn’t count on me having any useful skills. Don’t put me in a position where somebody else’s life depends on me.”

  “Lives will always depend on you. They always have. You know that.”

  With tremendous restraint, I kept from balling my fists in my hair. “I know, but… I mean… don’t expect me to know what to do.” His blank expression made my fear burst out. “I’m just a bookkeeper, for shit’s sake!”

  “Ah.” His eyes narrowed. “Yes. Your original cover. You’re right, that may present some difficulties. I’ll keep that in mind.”

  A wave of relief nearly made me melt in my chair. “Thank you.”

  He glanced at his watch. “The psychologist will be waiting in your office. Don’t mention anything classified.”

  I tottered out, my mind reeling. I couldn’t believe he hadn’t asked the obvious questions that would have nailed me to the wall. The numb incredulity carried me up the stairs and through the time delay chamber, where I barely noticed the thirty second countdown.

  As I felt my way into the ladies’ room on the second floor, my brain gradually rebooted.

  Stemp’s paranoia had just saved my ass. So many times, I’d cursed his refusal to provide us with more details than we absolutely needed to accomplish a mission. But now, he had asked only the questions necessary to assure him of my loyalty. Only what he needed to know, no more.

  All of a sudden, I didn’t hate him quite so much.

  When I entered my office a few minutes later, I swallowed a groan at the sight of the small balding man seated in the chair beside my sofa. Christ, wouldn’t you know it? Of all the people in the whole damn building, it had to be the psychologist who’d caught me freaking out in the secured area.

  He rose, extending his hand with a smile. “Agent Kelly? I’m Dr. Rawling.”

  “Hi.” I shook his hand, looking down into his kind eyes and letting out a secret breath of relief when he didn’t try to crush my hand. Too many times, I’d had to deal with short guys with compensation issues. At least Dr. Rawling didn’t seem to have a problem with tall women. But surely a psychologist would deal with his own shit…